He ain't wrong...

So, as usual Huffington Post is all melodramatic about George Zimmerman (and anything to do with race or sexuality, but that's another day).  In this case, the big deal is that he won't say he's sorry for killing Trayvon Martin.

Of course, they will not be willing to leave this alone until or unless Zimmerman makes a full confession to facts not in evidence, the facts Huffington and their ilk believe regardless of the lack of evidence.  Of course, they want everyone to assume that anyone who would kill someone in self-defense is a murderer, went out looking for the opportunity.  I think Zimmerman does a good job of saying what we all know is true; no one wants to kill another human being (but no one wants to die) and doing so changes one's life in irreversible ways; "Certainly, I think about that night and I think my life would be tremendously easier if I stayed home.”

Would I be sorry for killing someone who was intent on killing me?  I would be sorry that it ever came to that, I would wish they had chosen a different course, but in the moment of the act of self-defense, the moment where it would be kill or be killed, then feeling sorry for it means you wish you had died instead.

This is not unlike the case of Michael Dunn in some ways, although he clearly should have made better decisions (like immediately call 911, stay on scene).  Those who believe that Zimmerman should be sorry are suggesting that his actions lead to the tragic ends; our modern society prefers villains and heroes, no one between.  In some ways, the same thing can be said of Dunn; if he had simply not said anything about the loud music being played by the cherubs in the car next to him, this whole situation would have been avoided.  Of course, Zimmerman had every reason to think, given the neighborhood history, that a crime was being planned.  Dunn had little more reason than annoyance.  But are we now a nation where there are no rules and no one has a right to ask others to respect their wishes?  Is our only recourse to ignore inappropriate behavior lest it end in violence?

Yes, the Dunn case, and even the Curtis Reeves shooting, offer some other good examples:

First, indeed it appears we are now a society where one cannot complain about the inconsiderate behavior of others.  "Can you believe he complained that the man was texting before the movie?"  "Can you believe he actually asked those youngsters to turn down their music?"  Whether it is loud music or texting, challenging someone else's right to be obnoxious, asking or even demanding that they conform to the social contract, is now unacceptable and can lead to violent confrontation. So we are all supposed to succumb to such boorish behavior.

Second, an important survival lesson; if you are young black and bad and an older white guy complains about your music or you are middle-aged and white and bigger than the old guy who confronts you, don't assume that you can throw your weight around or threaten the old codger.  Yes, your survivors may scream for justice and drone on about what a good guy you were, but showing your ass in such challenges - playing monkey games - can get you shot.  If you were a "good guy" you would have handled it differently, too.  Makes for a crappy day at the movies or night at the convenience store when you decide you are too bad to be asked to change and then end up shot.

Third; concealed carriers - think twice about how your behavior can lead to incidents just one small step at a time.  We often talk of boiling the frog - how small changes can pass by unnoticed until we find ourselves in too deep.  One small comment can lead to another, to yelling, shoving, fisticuffs, and shooting.  Yes, people around us can be (hell, are) obnoxious and disturbing and we may feel someone, anyone, needs to intervene.  But if you bring a gun to that situation, you are asking for trouble.

I am sure Zimmerman regrets that evening of his life - he says as much - clearly nothing good has come of his need to defend himself, to save his own life while creating lethal consequences for Martin.  It is even more likely that Dunn regrets his (for many reasons; from failing to call 911, to leaving the scene, which allowed the vehicle into which he shot to leave the scene and potentially be cleaned of all traces of the weapon he thought he saw).  I hope Reeves regrets allowing texting to become a shooting.

But I also imagine that the families of those who died - if they could for one moment stop making heroes of their kin and trying to absolve them of any guilt, trying to convince us that they played no part at all in the chain of events - would also regret the way those days progressed.